Painting Faces

The unfiltered innocence of a child is to be cherished. Life teaches us from an early age to put on a mask to navigate different scenarios and relationships – familial, friendships, professional, social. It’s not about deception but rather to demonstrate emotional intelligence – including respect, collegiality, trust building. Sometimes, it is a necessity whenContinue reading “Painting Faces”

The Golden Spark

A single weed in a field of yellow can be magical. It’s that time in Spring when dandelions create a magical golden carpet on park fields. T and I enjoyed a nice walk on Mothers Day. The sun was shining and it was warm enough for T-shirts, shorts and crocs. “Oh my God, stop takingContinue reading “The Golden Spark”

Forever Young

Dinosaurs go extinct when they lose touch with their inner child. Raising T, a child with endless energy and a disability called FASD, can feel like I’m aging in double time – but it keeps me young. Even when I’m exhausted by T, I am amused by his imagination, as he turns our home intoContinue reading “Forever Young”

The Magical Yet

I didn’t get my driver’s license until my 30s and after failing the final road test twice. When I finally got it, it was a good reminder that some things that may seem out of reach at first may not always stay that way. As a parent of a child with FASD, I often thinkContinue reading “The Magical Yet”

The Spaces in Between

When we randomly came upon a photo of my late sister last weekend, T started to cry. It caught me by surprise, because while he’s expressed sadness about her death, this was the first time he’s cried. It was a reminder that grief is a process and that while so much has happened in theContinue reading “The Spaces in Between”

I Believe In You

How you see yourself makes a huge difference in how you experience the world. The hubby and I had our first parent-teacher interview last Friday with T’s Grade 2 teacher. The conversation focused on T’s challenges: focusing and completing his work; avoidance behaviour like taking long bathroom breaks, and social interaction. I felt deflated, becauseContinue reading “I Believe In You”

Watermelon Sugar

Do you run towards or flee from inevitable sunsets? September 9 is FASD Day, commemorated during FASD Awareness Month in September. September 9 symbolizes the ninth month of pregnancy and this day helps raise awareness about Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder and the experiences of individuals with FASD. People are encouraged to wear red shoes, anContinue reading “Watermelon Sugar”

Sharing A Child’s FASD Diagnosis with Them

How do you share difficult life changing news with a young child? That’s a question I’ve been thinking a lot about since we received T’s FASD diagnosis in January. The hubby and I shared the info with the school right away as it would better inform the way they supported T. We’ve held off onContinue reading “Sharing A Child’s FASD Diagnosis with Them”

Waves

“I get back up and I do it again. I get back up and I do it again…” One of my wishes with our vacation is to overfill T’s bucket with happy memories – so he has them during grayer days. I loved watching T play at the beach, with its soft white powder andContinue reading “Waves”

Making Popcorn

One freeing lesson I’ve learned is that every child’s potential pops at their own time. You may have seen this meme – the photo of popcorn with a message that reads: “Popcorn is prepared in the same pot, in the same heat, in the same oil, and here the kernels do not pop at theContinue reading “Making Popcorn”

Resolutions

Through virtual schooling, T learned about setting goals for the New Year. The related assignment is the last thing we had to catch up on and complete this weekend before we return to in-person learning this coming week. I often write about how we struggle with T to sit still and concentrate long enough toContinue reading “Resolutions”

Brittle and Faith

“There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” This is an excerpt from Leonard Cohen’s song “Anthem” that I saw posted on Instagram. After a year of best laid plans falling apart, we began 2022 by making something just to break it: peanut brittle, using this easy recipe from In Diane’sContinue reading “Brittle and Faith”

Losing Like Halle Berry

Having a sense of humour about when things do not go as planned is generally one of my instinctual responses in life. Dealing with loss and feeling like you’re failing is part of being a special needs parent. In the last few weeks, it’s been harder to find levity during the challenging moments. We’ve beenContinue reading “Losing Like Halle Berry”

Making Marriage Work in Special Needs Parenting

This Monday, we celebrated an amazing human’s birthday: the hubby turned 41. He took this week off work and I joined him for downtime on Monday. It was the first time we had to just the two of us in forever. When we started the adoption journey, a former manager told me to avoid adoptingContinue reading “Making Marriage Work in Special Needs Parenting”

The Promise of a New Day

This Thanksgiving, I am grateful for the fresh start that each new day brings. The last two weeks have been rough with T. I don’t know if it’s because the honeymoon phase at school has passed or if he’s finding the transition period challenging but we’ve had rough patches on an almost daily basis. DuringContinue reading “The Promise of a New Day”

The New Boy in the Park

A wonderful shortlived friendship T made was a reminder about kindness and being present. I often think about friendships, because I’ve read it’s often a challenge for individuals with an invisible disability, such as FASD. It was one of the hardest parts of the pandemic, knowing T was isolated at home and missing out onContinue reading “The New Boy in the Park”

Candid Conversation: Raising Jess and Finding Hope

It’s inspiring and comforting to connect with other parents on the special needs journey. Vickie Rubin is the author of Vickie’s Views, a heartwarming and inspiring blog about raising her daughter Jess. Vickie has a background in early childhood education and special education. This month, she releases her memoir Raising Jess: A Story of Hope.Continue reading “Candid Conversation: Raising Jess and Finding Hope”

Helping Kids Set and Achieve Goals

One recent win we had was helping T set daily goals that positively impacted virtual schooling. T’s Child and Youth Worker was motivated – as were we – to get him to participate more in class. Depending on which camp you fall on, you may find token charts useful or eye rolling in shaping behaviourContinue reading “Helping Kids Set and Achieve Goals”

Your Disco Needs You

Our 6 year old’s quirky song of choice made me reflect on how we should live life like a disco ball. Enjoying music together with T is one thing I cherish in our relationship. For a long time, all he listened to was Queen’s “We Will Rock You.” I went on a recent binge ofContinue reading “Your Disco Needs You”

Coming Out… Again and Again

I came out in my teen years. Decades later, I am coming out again as a special needs parent. As the world celebrates Pride Month and the importance of inclusion, love and tolerance, I am thankful for living in a part of the world that is, for the most part, progressive and inclusive. I cameContinue reading “Coming Out… Again and Again”