Open to Feedback

Being able to receive and apply feedback, as hard as it can be to hear sometimes, is key to growth. In February, halfway past the Grade 3 school year, the hubby and I had our teacher conference with T’s teacher, CYW and the school’s special education coordinator. We discussed T’s areas for improvement: reading, writingContinue reading “Open to Feedback”

Angels in the Infield

During school lunch a few weeks ago, T proclaimed to his class he was refunding his parents. His CYW recounted to us with amusement, via text message, that T ranted out loud that he had told Daddy (the hubby) many times that he didn’t want meatballs for lunch and still got them. Due to thisContinue reading “Angels in the Infield”

The Writing Parlour

Helping my third grader build writing skills is like making pizza; layer one ingredient on at a time. The process sometimes feels like a struggle with a disability like FASD layered on top – but it nonetheless feels like I’m watching something special grow from infancy. It brings back fond memories of the early days,Continue reading “The Writing Parlour”

Big Brother

This is the start of a beautiful friendship. Last fall, T’s child and youth worker made the excellent suggestion to look into a Big Brother-style mentorship program for T. I believe in mentorship and surrounding T with positive influences is important, because making friends is hard for kids with FASD. Despite best efforts, we haveContinue reading “Big Brother”

Love and Karma

The energy we send into the universe is the energy we invite into our lives. I found this belief challenged the past few weeks, because of T’s chaos – meltdowns, foul language, rude attitude, defiant behaviour at school. It was draining – and at one point, I told the hubby I did not have theContinue reading “Love and Karma”

To Teachers with Love

The influence of a great teacher is longlasting. Thanks to Mrs Smith in Grade 3, who introduced us to daily journal writing, I developed an early start to expressing myself through words. Tough but fair and kind teachers, like Mrs Ezer in high school, were whom I learned the most from. I keep it touchContinue reading “To Teachers with Love”

Uplift through Testimony

There is power and purpose in sharing stories. One voice can join a chorus to make a difference. This week, I joined a director from the Surrey Place to make a deputation to our school board, the largest school board in Canada and one of the largest in North America. Our goal was to raiseContinue reading “Uplift through Testimony”

The Power of Yet

T asked the lifeguard if he could try the deep end test. It was his first-ever attempt. Would he make it? I thought about this recent outing at the community pool, as it’s goal-setting time for the school year. This year, I love how T’s teacher included the kids in the process, using the PowerContinue reading “The Power of Yet”

Fried Spam with Rice

Like many immigrant kids, I’ve experienced many “smelly weird” school lunches packed by Pa. But I loved them all and the one I looked forward to most was fried spam on a warm bed of rice. I would inhale the luncheon meat, its greasy goodness soaked up by the rice. This weekend is Pa’s deathContinue reading “Fried Spam with Rice”

Leap of Faith

We were racing against sunset as we hiked up the rocky hill to get to the cliffs to jump into the bay. It was our first day camping at Killbear and we had just finished dinner. We had decided we would do cliff jumping the following day, but T was insistent, so the hubby andContinue reading “Leap of Faith”

Embracing His Inner Dennis the Menace

Half a year after we shared his FASD diagnosis with T, it has clicked with him. On a recent morning, T wanted to play with one of our two cats, which is often a hit or miss event. T stayed gentle and our cat finally went up to T to smell his hand then letContinue reading “Embracing His Inner Dennis the Menace”

When Training Wheels Come Off

To kick off summer, T scored his first bloody busted upper lip after a biking accident. But let’s rewind a week to the morning of the same day T marched in the Pride parade for the first time – when the hubby took him out on his bike. The bike was a gift from hisContinue reading “When Training Wheels Come Off”

Sprint to the Finish

Friday was Track and Field Day. T crushed and won his races, including the 1500m and 800m. Earlier in the week, on Tuesday, the hubby, T and I participated in the final session of the SNAP program, which we participated in to build skills to make better choices and co-regulate with T when moments getContinue reading “Sprint to the Finish”

The Golden Spark

A single weed in a field of yellow can be magical. It’s that time in Spring when dandelions create a magical golden carpet on park fields. T and I enjoyed a nice walk on Mothers Day. The sun was shining and it was warm enough for T-shirts, shorts and crocs. “Oh my God, stop takingContinue reading “The Golden Spark”

Forever Young

Dinosaurs go extinct when they lose touch with their inner child. Raising T, a child with endless energy and a disability called FASD, can feel like I’m aging in double time – but it keeps me young. Even when I’m exhausted by T, I am amused by his imagination, as he turns our home intoContinue reading “Forever Young”

Unchained from the Rhythm

By recently plugging away from screentime, we’re finding more ways to connect as a family. It all started a few weeks ago when T, in a disregulated fit, hurled his first F-bomb at the hubby. We grounded him from his tablet for a week; which got extended into two. I remember telling the hubby whatContinue reading “Unchained from the Rhythm”

The Magical Yet

I didn’t get my driver’s license until my 30s and after failing the final road test twice. When I finally got it, it was a good reminder that some things that may seem out of reach at first may not always stay that way. As a parent of a child with FASD, I often thinkContinue reading “The Magical Yet”

Fighting Spirit

Body, mind, spirit. They are all connected and nourishing them means a stronger you. Self care is as essential as oxygen to daily life as a parent of a child with FASD. Last fall and the first few weeks of the new year drained my batteries and emptied my reserves. I did not have theContinue reading “Fighting Spirit”

Together We Are More

I recently thought about a bedtime story called “The Bundle of Sticks” that Pa used to tell me. As this Aesop’s Fable goes, an old man gathers his 20 dysfunctional sons as he nears his death. He gives them each a stick and asks them to break it – and they each do so withContinue reading “Together We Are More”

Stand Under My Umbrella

Six years ago today, also a Wednesday, T, the hubby and I became a forever family. In many ways, it feels like a lifetime ago when our adoption was finalized in court – and in other ways, I think with awe, “Has it been only six years?!” So many moments have happened since – joyousContinue reading “Stand Under My Umbrella”