A subtraction worksheet drove me into a meltdown with our neurodiverse 10-year-old. I had an early start to a typical Tuesday work day, followed by a two-hour evening meeting of a Family Advisory Council that I volunteer with. After the meeting, I was hungry, brain-dead and just wanted to crawl into bed. But math homeworkContinue reading “Regrouping: Finding Resilience in the Caregiving Journey”
Category Archives: Positive Parenting
The Scarecrow
What are the urban legends we tell to keep people in line? On a recent Sunday grocery run with T, as I parked the car, he said, “There’s an owl on the roof.” I love that T notices things that we normally miss. There indeed was an owl on the roof of the supermarket, picturedContinue reading “The Scarecrow”
Futures Planning for the Neurodiverse Child
One thing that keeps me up as a special needs parent is thinking about our child’s future. My workplace is developing its next multi-year strategic plan. Participating in the process made me think about T’s next few years. Any special needs parent will tell you we just want to make it to the end ofContinue reading “Futures Planning for the Neurodiverse Child”
Angels in the Infield
During school lunch a few weeks ago, T proclaimed to his class he was refunding his parents. His CYW recounted to us with amusement, via text message, that T ranted out loud that he had told Daddy (the hubby) many times that he didn’t want meatballs for lunch and still got them. Due to thisContinue reading “Angels in the Infield”
The Darkest Dark
We remind our little guy that he is stronger and braver than the monsters in his head. During a recent Sunday morning, around 1:30, I was woken up by the hubby having a fit. T had turned on all the lights in the house, downstairs included, and was up playing with his toys – becauseContinue reading “The Darkest Dark”
The Writing Parlour
Helping my third grader build writing skills is like making pizza; layer one ingredient on at a time. The process sometimes feels like a struggle with a disability like FASD layered on top – but it nonetheless feels like I’m watching something special grow from infancy. It brings back fond memories of the early days,Continue reading “The Writing Parlour”
Painting Faces
The unfiltered innocence of a child is to be cherished. Life teaches us from an early age to put on a mask to navigate different scenarios and relationships – familial, friendships, professional, social. It’s not about deception but rather to demonstrate emotional intelligence – including respect, collegiality, trust building. Sometimes, it is a necessity whenContinue reading “Painting Faces”
Forever Young
Dinosaurs go extinct when they lose touch with their inner child. Raising T, a child with endless energy and a disability called FASD, can feel like I’m aging in double time – but it keeps me young. Even when I’m exhausted by T, I am amused by his imagination, as he turns our home intoContinue reading “Forever Young”
The Magical Yet
I didn’t get my driver’s license until my 30s and after failing the final road test twice. When I finally got it, it was a good reminder that some things that may seem out of reach at first may not always stay that way. As a parent of a child with FASD, I often thinkContinue reading “The Magical Yet”
Sharing A Child’s FASD Diagnosis with Them
How do you share difficult life changing news with a young child? That’s a question I’ve been thinking a lot about since we received T’s FASD diagnosis in January. The hubby and I shared the info with the school right away as it would better inform the way they supported T. We’ve held off onContinue reading “Sharing A Child’s FASD Diagnosis with Them”
Hitting the Reset Button
During a work call, I got a call from T’s daycare teacher. She was not her usual calm self. She said an older student had ran off the bus during drop off and pushed T against a wall. She had to shield him from further harm. A few hours earlier, the hubby and I receivedContinue reading “Hitting the Reset Button”
Waves
“I get back up and I do it again. I get back up and I do it again…” One of my wishes with our vacation is to overfill T’s bucket with happy memories – so he has them during grayer days. I loved watching T play at the beach, with its soft white powder andContinue reading “Waves”
Resolutions
Through virtual schooling, T learned about setting goals for the New Year. The related assignment is the last thing we had to catch up on and complete this weekend before we return to in-person learning this coming week. I often write about how we struggle with T to sit still and concentrate long enough toContinue reading “Resolutions”
Brittle and Faith
“There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” This is an excerpt from Leonard Cohen’s song “Anthem” that I saw posted on Instagram. After a year of best laid plans falling apart, we began 2022 by making something just to break it: peanut brittle, using this easy recipe from In Diane’sContinue reading “Brittle and Faith”
Making Marriage Work in Special Needs Parenting
This Monday, we celebrated an amazing human’s birthday: the hubby turned 41. He took this week off work and I joined him for downtime on Monday. It was the first time we had to just the two of us in forever. When we started the adoption journey, a former manager told me to avoid adoptingContinue reading “Making Marriage Work in Special Needs Parenting”
The Promise of a New Day
This Thanksgiving, I am grateful for the fresh start that each new day brings. The last two weeks have been rough with T. I don’t know if it’s because the honeymoon phase at school has passed or if he’s finding the transition period challenging but we’ve had rough patches on an almost daily basis. DuringContinue reading “The Promise of a New Day”
Candid Conversation: Raising Jess and Finding Hope
It’s inspiring and comforting to connect with other parents on the special needs journey. Vickie Rubin is the author of Vickie’s Views, a heartwarming and inspiring blog about raising her daughter Jess. Vickie has a background in early childhood education and special education. This month, she releases her memoir Raising Jess: A Story of Hope.Continue reading “Candid Conversation: Raising Jess and Finding Hope”
Your Disco Needs You
Our 6 year old’s quirky song of choice made me reflect on how we should live life like a disco ball. Enjoying music together with T is one thing I cherish in our relationship. For a long time, all he listened to was Queen’s “We Will Rock You.” I went on a recent binge ofContinue reading “Your Disco Needs You”
Coming Out… Again and Again
I came out in my teen years. Decades later, I am coming out again as a special needs parent. As the world celebrates Pride Month and the importance of inclusion, love and tolerance, I am thankful for living in a part of the world that is, for the most part, progressive and inclusive. I cameContinue reading “Coming Out… Again and Again”
Visiting My Kindergartener’s Class
It’s the horror every child dreads: when the parent visits their class. It began when T’s class, still virtual, was doing a week-long lesson about rainforests. Unbeknownst to me, the hubby reached out to T’s teacher to share a read-aloud video that I had done a few years ago. It was part of a funContinue reading “Visiting My Kindergartener’s Class”
My Life With T 