The Wedding

We took our 7-year-old to his first wedding this past weekend. Well, at least the first wedding he’ll remember. He attended his first and only wedding in 2016, a friend’s destination wedding, when he was 1. As with all social events, we had some initial apprehension of how T will be. But we believe it’sContinue reading “The Wedding”

Sharing Our Son’s FASD Diagnosis with Him

There are crucial conversations in life that stick out vividly long after they’ve happened. Coming out when I was 14; telling my parents I was moving out; our wedding vows; the adoption worker telling us we were matched with T. Over the Christmas break, I had two more: one that was planned and another thatContinue reading “Sharing Our Son’s FASD Diagnosis with Him”

Marshmallow Halo

Processing and understanding death is hard for kids. Sometimes, stuffed animals can help. T’s Auntie’s – my sister’s – death a few days after Christmas was sudden and despite the unexpectedness, T is doing ok. I continue to check in with him every day to see how he’s doing. Kids often don’t tell you howContinue reading “Marshmallow Halo”

In the Arms of an Angel

Our family faced a sudden loss – for T, his first experience with losing someone – over the holidays. My sister passed away last Thursday, a few days after being admitted to the hospital on Christmas Day, after a short and brave battle with cancer. My family and I are still processing and making senseContinue reading “In the Arms of an Angel”

Believe in Your Goodness

Faith is not believing things will always work out but that you will be ok regardless of how they do. It was an up and down week at school. So the start of the holidays was so welcomed. T made a lovely note for Santa last night. When he woke up this Christmas morning, heContinue reading “Believe in Your Goodness”

I Believe In You

How you see yourself makes a huge difference in how you experience the world. The hubby and I had our first parent-teacher interview last Friday with T’s Grade 2 teacher. The conversation focused on T’s challenges: focusing and completing his work; avoidance behaviour like taking long bathroom breaks, and social interaction. I felt deflated, becauseContinue reading “I Believe In You”

Second Chances

What parents won’t often admit: When they ground their kids, they are punishing themselves too. After T’s unfortunate incident with taking the lollipop from the store, we grounded him last weekend; no electronics and he would not have his Halloween decor, bought on the same trip to the store, until next year. It may seemContinue reading “Second Chances”

The Boogeyman

This is a very hard post to write, but I’ve learned that fears die down when you face them. I’ve been enjoying the ramp up to Halloween – recently catching a matinee of “Halloween Ends.” Yesterday night, a real horror scenario played out: T took a lollipop from a store without paying for it. ThisContinue reading “The Boogeyman”

On a Night Like This

When the unicorn of a night out without T presents itself, I grab it by the horn and go for a ride. Going into parenthood 6 years ago, I knew weekend night outs by myself would be rare. When we do go out, it’s usually with friends; company that we enjoy. Parenting a child withContinue reading “On a Night Like This”

Secret Sauce

Asian cooking and special needs parenting have one thing in common: assembling your ingredients. Hear me out. I have not gone off the deep fried end; not yet, anyway. As parents of a child with FASD, the hubby and I have learned so much. We’ve been blessed with help to create a toolkit of ingredientsContinue reading “Secret Sauce”

The Traveller

What’s the meaning of a name and does it express one’s desire in life? For social studies this week, T completed an assignment that asked to research his name. It turns out one of the meanings is “traveller.” To see the world was one thing the hubby and I prioritized during life before T. TravelingContinue reading “The Traveller”

Cross Country Race

Our little guy competed in his first cross country school meetup today. For a kid who is endlessly active, gym is a class T struggled with the last few years. For his mid-year report card last year, his gym teacher gave him an “I,” as he didn’t participate enough for her to give a properContinue reading “Cross Country Race”

Walking Towards Hope

Inspiration exists in all forms and they are so important when traveling down unpaved road. Thanks to our FASD service provider, the hubby and I recently joined a cohort of parents and caregivers for a weekly support group. It’s an 8-week pilot initiative hosted by Surrey Place, an amazing organization that has supported T sinceContinue reading “Walking Towards Hope”

Rain

God bless the innocent unfiltered honesty of children. During a drive to a family lunch today, there was torrential downpour. The visibility was bad and the conditions got quite dangerous at one point. Suddenly, T says matter of factly, “Good thing I don’t live with my mother. She’s homeless. I would be soaking wet!” T’sContinue reading “Rain”

Guiding Light

Earlier this month, Pa would’ve turned 100. I thought about him when T had his first swim lesson. T’s always loved the water. The outdoor pools saved our pandemic summers and T loves swimming in lakes during our outdoor adventures. He’s very comfortable in the water and it was time he learned proper swim technique.Continue reading “Guiding Light”

Stand Up Paddle Boarding

Experiencing life through a child’s eyes is sweeter when you do something for the first time together. On Sunday, our friend, T’s Auntie E, whom we recently went to Tobermory with, organized a stand up paddle board outing for friends and us. E is a SUP hobbyist and took us to Cherry Beach, a scenicContinue reading “Stand Up Paddle Boarding”

Training Wheels

The sandwich generation experiences the joys of kids growing up and the sorrow of aging parents. Earlier this summer, T showed interest in bike riding again after having no interest last year. While he loves zipping down the park, he doesn’t yet feel comfortable taking off the training wheels. And that’s ok. I thought aboutContinue reading “Training Wheels”

Sanity Savers for Enjoying An Outing with A Neurodiverse Child

Some people joke their restless kids are “climbing the walls.” Kids like our T actually climb them. I’ve seen memes of this boy climbing a pillar in an airport (below) many times on social media. I empathize with this kindred spirit. Even though it’s never disclosed why this kid was climbing, I infer and understandContinue reading “Sanity Savers for Enjoying An Outing with A Neurodiverse Child”

The Dance of Life

Music can be such a revelation. Every August 16, we celebrate Queen Madonna’s birthday; she turned 64 on Tuesday. I discovered her music in high school in ‘98 and continue to admire her tireless work ethic, tenacity, fearlessness, and advocacy. Just as she redefined music, it’s interesting to watch her age on her own terms,Continue reading “The Dance of Life”

First Sleepover

A cotton candy sunset on the beach was the backdrop to a memorable first for our boy. Our three-week family vacation is flying by. We are creating happy memories while navigating super trying moments. Last Sunday, the end of week two, T was reunited with his cousin A, who was visiting for the week. AsContinue reading “First Sleepover”