Meet the Parents

When the hubby and my parents first met each other 20 years ago, it started quite comically.

A few seconds into meeting, Ma started talking about the time she and her siblings drove by New Brunswick, where my in laws live, and didn’t think much of it because she didn’t see any flowers.

It was not meant in a bad way, just her usual Asian frankness. Over the years, my father in law would egg her on by sending photos of flowers to share with Ma. 😆

All jokes aside, we’ve been blessed to have loving parents who get along.

Whenever my in laws visited, we would get together with my parents – taking them to Chinese restaurants to try something different.

I remember when a dimsum server was wheeling beef balls around, my mother in law muttered, “That’s not what I think it is, is it?” 😆

Eight years ago, before T joined our family, Ma joined the hubby and I for our summer roadtrip to visit my in-laws at their cottage in New Brunswick.

The hubby’s parents took Ma and us on a boat ride to fish for mackerel. We all had fun!

I’m glad the hubby got to know my Pa before he passed away.

I chuckle thinking about the first time the hubby slept over, when I still lived with my parents. Pa opened the door and the first thing he said was the hubby was sleeping in my sister’s room. 😂

But the hubby won him over by always coming over with a lottery ticket for him. That charmer!

I often wish Pa lived long enough to meet T – the two of them would’ve adored each other, in the same way our remaining parents adore T and he adores them.

His Ama, Grammy and Grandad didn’t first grasp his disability, but they’ve all been open to learn and most importantly, they love T unconditionally despite his challenging moments.

On Tuesday, T walked in the house after school and asked, “Why does it smell different?”

I replied, “Because it’s clean.” 🤣

The hubby’s parents were arriving that night to stay for a few days – en route to home after snowbirding in the States.

We spent the weekend cleaning the house top to bottom. Even T helped – because he was excited to see his Grammy and Grandad, his first time since last summer.

It was therapeutic cleaning our guest room, as it was the first time someone was staying in there after my sister lived with us last fall.

As a special needs and working parent, housework becomes lower priority despite our best efforts.

We could’ve made a new cat with the fur and dust we vacuumed up from our guest room!

Early Tuesday night, T ran screaming excitedly in our bedroom, “They’re here, they’re here!”

T ran to the door to give them a big welcome hug.

It was nice to have them stay with us. The hubby was able to take the rest of the week off work but I was not, as I had just taken March Break off. But it was nice to give them alone time together.

T enjoyed playing with his grandparents at night and it was very helpful to have their help with making dinner for us while they were here.

We took T out of his after school program on Friday so he could spend more time with his grandparents.

We took them to Dragon Legend for dinner, so they could try out a unique buffet experience. Ma was supposed to join but felt under the weather.

After dinner, we went for a sunset walk around the neighbourhood.

The following Saturday morning, we all got up very early to wish T’s grandparents off as they left early for their long drive home.

T waved enthusiastically from our front steps as the car drove off, screaming “I love you!” at the top of his lungs.

23 thoughts on “Meet the Parents

  1. That photo of the dust looks exactly like our house when I clean which isn’t very often lol. I get very overwhelmed and don’t know where to start. Love that T gets to hang with his grandparents. My kids have such a special bond with theirs💖💖💖

    1. Thanks Rebecca. Cleaning and having the time to do so does feel like a luxury on most days! 😆

  2. Beautiful post Ab – as always. Meeting the parents for the first time is always an adventure. I remember being so nervous when I first meet my wife’s parents. My wife actually meet my parents before she meet me! She had their approval in advance. Sad that your dad isn’t around to know T but blessed T is to have three who are and love him so. Wishing you and yours well Ab 🙏

    1. Thanks AP! Now there’s a story I want to know more about – your wife meeting your parents before you. You’ll have to share this one day! 😊

  3. Such a heartwarming story, Ab! I love all those funny moments during the first encounters between your parents and your hubby and his parents. Things like this never fail to make good and lighthearted conversations in family gatherings. It’s so sweet when T was so excited to see your in laws. This pure emotion is something we as adults often forget how to do due to all the societal constraints.

    1. Thanks Bama! I think you said it best – they make great conversations that you repeat again and again over the years. 😊 And you’re right about societal constraints and it’s so great kids have yet to learn about them – and hopefully don’t!

  4. How wonderful that you have a good relationship with all three grandparents. So sad that your dad didn’t live to be a part of it all, but it sounds like your mum and in-laws are doing a great job of providing T with plenty of grandparent memories! So many families lack that … the parents are either too busy with their own lives, or too judgmental. I love hearing that T was yelling “I Love You!” as they drove off! Great times.

    1. Thanks Jill. My dad was quite old already. He had me when he was 60 and passed away at 86. If he stuck around for T, he would’ve been 93. And I agree with you that having a support system in an extended family is so invaluable and for that I feel so incredibly blessed. 🙏

  5. Love this story Ab! Clearly T adores his grandparents! I have to tell you I am super impressed that the bed was actually lifted up for vacuuming. I’m not sure I’ve ever done that for anyone but then I saw the cat bucket and things made a bit more sense after that 😉 Glad you all had a good time.

    1. Thanks Deb! My father in law is allergic to cats, and the cats tend to hang out in our guest room, so we have to clean it very thoroughly and then shut the door at all times. or it’s gonna be constant tears. Haha. The cleaning was worth it for T to spend those precious few days with them.

      1. Well maybe before their next visit you can have a discussion with the felines and ask them to keep their fur in place. I’m sure they don’t realize how much grandpa would suffer with all that lovely fur floating around! But I have heard that cats will be cats so I suppose my idea might not be appreciated 😉

  6. That’s amazing that T has a great relationship with his grandparents and that they have learned about his disability and accepted him for it. I went to a family friend’s 70th birthday party yesterday. His son is gay and his daughter has dwarfism, and there were 30 guests and not one of them said anything negative about his kids. I don’t know if they did in the past, but it’s great to see how my family friend has so many people who love and accept his family

    1. Thank you Claire. I love your story about your family friend. It is very touching when family and friends can rally around a family with additional needs and challenges. I know this is not always the case so I feel blessed and don’t ever take it for granted.

      1. Absolutely! It’s not always easy to adjust to a child with a disability, and my family friend and his wife have been very open about those struggles. So glad they are!

  7. I love this. Laughed out loud at the line, “As a special needs and working parent, housework becomes lower priority despite our best efforts.” That might be the understatement of the year if it’s anything like it is in my house. 🙂

    I love that your parents and hubby’s parents have/had a great relationship and that T gets to know the remaining three. I know your dad would have loved to know T as well but I bet T has a wonderful relationship with him through stories.

    Not only did you get a fun visit this week, a sunset walk, and dinner out – but a clean house. What a week!

    1. Thanks Wynne! I think you can relate that finding the time and energy to clean just feels impossible on most days – but hopefully as T get older, he’ll help out more too.

      Yes, T knows and is knowing more about his “Angkong,” and he’s visited him many times at the cemetery. He’s buried immediately next to my sister, so there’ll be many reasons to visit again and again.

      It was a busy but filling week and hope you had a good one too!

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