Eight years ago today, we got a call from Children’s Aid Society. We were matched with a child!
It was a Thursday evening and the hubby and I were shocked, because it had been seven years since we had started the adoption journey. We had given up hope we would be parents.
They shared T’s history and we learned he was prenatally exposed to alcohol and it was one of the things we said we would not take on.
But when we met his foster mother the next day and saw T’s photo, at age 1, we fell in love.
From that day on, it was like boarding a bullet train and our lives have been a roller coaster ride since.
Caring for a child with FASD is relentless. The speed, the chaos – they never slow down, even though you feel the wheels of the train falling off.
Most days come with challenges that most people could not understand nor bear.
But thanks to T, we’ve experienced the joys of parenting, many incredible memories, and love and grace.
So it was fitting that on this day today that T would be reunited with his foster family, who took amazing care of him for his first year of life.
It was his foster brother’s birthday and he invited T to his party.
The last time we saw them was four years ago, for T’s 5th birthday, a month before the world shut down for the pandemic.
T was very excited to see them, including during the hour-long drive to their town.
The party was held at a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu studio and there were parkour activities, nerf gun shootouts, pizza and cake.
I loved watching T reunite with his foster parents and brother, as if time had not passed. The bond was still there.
T’s foster brother is also neurodivergent and while his parents never quite said it, I expect it might also be FASD. But it’s not my place to ask and they will share when they want to.
His mother shared with us about their struggles and I wish we lived closer, so T and his foster brother could be companions.
But alas, the sweetness of life is to be savoured, and the party flew by and it was time to say bye.
T gave his foster parents and brother big hugs and off we went, driving home in the heavy rain.
There was a nice message on the wall of the Jiu Jitsu venue. It read, “Today’s challenges become tomorrow’s strengths.”
Just like T was meant to be in our lives, I was meant to see that message today – to remind me that the hardships we face today will bear sweet fruit for T tomorrow.
My Life With T 
💛✨🙏💓
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Thanks Cherryl! 💕
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I had no idea the adoption process took so long! Sounds like it was worth the wait because you ended up with T. It’s pretty amazing that you’ve kept in touch with his foster family and that the bond with his foster brother is still going strong. Hope all is well with you guys. We’re back from holidays and I’m slowly getting caught up with WP.
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Thanks Linda! I’m glad we’ve kept in touch too.
Where did you go on holidays again? Look forward to reading all about it!
We have a few weeks to go before Banff and I’m slowly getting excited. 🙂
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That’s so beautiful. Thank goodness you saw his one-year-old picture. Really happy for him to have had this special day with his former foster family. Great they all get along so well even after all these years. 🙂 ❤
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Thank you Betsy! Life works out the way it’s supposed to. This journey with T reminds me of that each and every single day. 🙏
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Your story, Ab, and the love you and your hubby share with T is such an inspiration! It truly restores my faith in the power of human connection and unconditional love. You’ve built a beautiful family together, and I’m so happy you also reconnected with the foster family too! 🤍
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Thank you Stacy. 😊 It is often not easy but I think deep down as you said, human connection and unconditional love are what will get us through the ups and downs. And yes, we’re so blessed to continue to have the connection with his first family.
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Bless you and your husband for your big hearts. Having parents who accept him for who he is is probably one of the greatest gifts T could ever get in his life. He might not understand it now, but I hope — I’m sure — one day he will.
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Thank you Bama. I really needed this lovely and reassuring comment today. 😊🤗 I hope so too. A nice way to end the day before bed. Enjoy your Wednesday! It’ll be done by the time I wake up. 😆
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Ab, the two 2-Dad families I know best also have kids with neurodivergent issues. My guess is that these kids are the ones waiting for adoption. My experience with my friends mirrors what you describe, a home filled with love and understanding. These are lucky boys and blessed parents, making each others’ lives complete. And never dull!! Bless you. 😊
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Thanks Jane for that kind and reassuring comment. Raising neurodiverse kids is not easy but having a good home helps a lot. And it most certainly is never dull! 😆
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That message is perfect. It is often a challenging journey, but so worth it ❤️
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Thanks Gary. I know you can relate. Some days are so hard but you keep going because of the love and joy.
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Beautiful story. Fate definitely at work. Thanks for sharing the ride with us Ab.
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Thanks Brian. Fate is definitely at work. I love that!
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Beautiful, though and through. It gave me chills reading that prenatal expose to alcohol was something you’d been wary of, but seeing T was love at first sight. It sounds like you were meant to be a family all along. It’s also so admirable that you’ve gifted T the opportunity to know his foster family. While T may be faced with challenges in his journey, I get the impression that you and your husband are the perfect people to offer him guidance and support. What a blessing that is. 🥰
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Thanks Erin. I think we were blessed at the time with not fully knowing what lies ahead of us! 😆 And we’re lucky indeed to keep contact with his foster family. It helps with his whole sense of self and history.
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🥰🥰🥰
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“it was like boarding a bullet train and our lives have been a roller coaster ride since.” Thank goodness you boarded that train, Ab! Love how you connect with all the passengers on the train and that you take us along for the ride! Happy Match Day!
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Thanks Wynne. I love the Match Day name! 🙂 And I love how you extended the train metaphor to include the passengers. So many amazing people we’ve met along the ride!
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Oh…the big hugs to say goodbye and that parting message – blast of wisdom on the wall. Beautiful, beautiful. Thanks, Ab. And Happy Eight Year Anniversary – to you and the hubs – for making a wonderful decision, welcoming T into your lives. 🥰🥰🥰
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Thank you, Vicki. Hard to believe it’s been 8 years and it really has been a wonderful decision.
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What a great sign and reminder. So many people are helping to grow T into a great human and helping him to meet his challenges, while meeting their own.
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Thanks Deb. We are lucky to have a great village around this little kid. We need and appreciate every member rallying around him.
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Beautiful story – And I love the quote – “Today’s challenges become tomorrow’s strengths.” I am preparing for a podcast and will use that wise philosophy. Thanks for sharing –
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Thanks Vickie! Good luck with the podcast. And it really is a wonderful quote!
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What an uplifting post Ab! How commendable of you to keep in touch with T’s foster parents so T could also stay in touch with their son. That sounds like an amazing place for a party!
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Thanks Diane. It was four years since our last get together but nice to see the bond was still there.
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It’s so nice that you kept in touch with them!
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Thanks Margie. It really is nice we’ve kept in touch.
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Such a blessing that you all found one another and thanks for sharing the message. I needed that as well.
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Thanks Tammy. It is a true blessing our lives connected in the way that it has! And that message is a wonderful reminder for everyone facing adversity.
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