The Loving Hearts of Grandparents

Posted byAbPosted inADHD, adoption, Christmas, Family, FASD, love, ParentingTags:, , ,

T’s grandparents were in town to celebrate the hubby’s 45th birthday – and it was wonderful to spend family time together.

They arrived Wednesday night and T was so excited to see them.

Friday was a PA Day and the hubby and I took the day off work. We took Grammy and Grandad on their first visit to the charming and festive Christmas Market at the Distillery District.

T was overexcited and his hyperactivity was too much for everyone.

Despite that, Grandad got him cotton candy. The wonderful thing about grandparents is they love to their grandkids no matter what.

The hubby and I are fortunate to have great in-laws in our respective parents.

We get along and they love and accept T despite his challenging moments.

I’m so comfortable with them that when T has a meltdown or is disregulated, I don’t feel the same anxiety or stress as I would with my family.

The one exception is Ma, who loved T without judgment. I thought about her as I watched T spend time Grammy and Grandad.

I miss Ma a lot and the pain of her loss hits me at unexpected times. The world does feel lonelier without our moms.

I am thankful T gets to spend a substantial part of his childhood with grandparents on both sides; only Ma’s mother was alive when I was born and she passed away when I was 6.

I see through T’s eyes and experiences that a grandparent’s love is unique and the relationship between grandparent and grandchild is special.

This illustrated portrait of T and Ma sits in his room, something he specifically placed.

I wish the hubby’s family lived closer, as T responds well to them and their unconditional love is so good for his self esteem.

So I always welcome time spent with them and prioritize our annual two-week summer roadtrip to visit them in New Brunswick.

I often remind the hubby to enjoy his parents, as their time together is finite and fleeting.

The rest of the weekend was lowkey.

The hubby’s parents and I played many rounds of our favourite card game Five Crowns.

Grandad joined T and I for his Saturday morning swim lessons and Grammy joined us for T’s soccer practice on Sunday.

T had math tutoring with Ms Karen Sunday afternoon and she raved to Grammy and Grandad about how well T is doing. I could see the pride on T’s face felt.

On Saturday night, I took the family to Dragon Legend buffet for the hubby’s birthday dinner.

It felt like we just celebrated his 40th during the pandemic but alas, five years just flew by.

Then we enjoyed a white chocolate cake at home.

T came up with the cake topper message and his heartfelt words were on point: “We love you, Daddy!”

44 thoughts on “The Loving Hearts of Grandparents”

  1. These are truly precious moments and connections, Ab. I also know the ache of missing our loved ones and the beauty it brings to our current connections. ❤️

    I am sending you and your lots of care this holiday season.

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    1. Thank you LaDonna for your warm wishes. I am also sending you love and care during the holidays. I know it’ll be bittersweet for you as well. Hope you enjoy your Thanksgiving with loved ones. 💕

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    1. Thanks Serena. I think meltdowns are just a part of life, but hopefully he will learn to better regulate his emotions as he gets older. The joys of special needs caregiving! 😊

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  5. What a WONDERFUL family you have, Ab! The picture of Ma and T that he keeps in his room is so beautiful it nearly brought a tear to my eye. I’m so glad you had a great time … and Happy Birthday to your Hubby!!!

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    1. Thanks Jill. We’re very blessed with good supports through the harder challenges. And that picture of my Ma and T is so special to me. I’m glad T keeps it near and dear to him. 💕🙏

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  6. “I often remind the hubby to enjoy his parents, as their time together is finite and fleeting.” This line particularly resonated – as my husband and I travel back and forth to Maryland because his Dad (my FIL) is not doing well. Thank you for the beautiful post. In my presentations, I often talk about the importance of grandparents and how the disability affects them – they are worried for the grandchild and their children…it’s complicated – sounds like you both have supportive in-laws. Loved the drawing too! 💖 V

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    1. Thanks Vickie as always for the encouraging support. The sandwich generation is so hard. But what a privilege and blessing for Mitch’s dad to be a great grandfather! 😊 We’re blessed to have great in laws. As you know, it makes such a difference!

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  7. Happy birthday to hubby! How wonderful that you got to spend time with his family.

    You’re right about grandparents. I regret that I only ever had a relationship with one of my four grandparents—my Nanna on my dad’s side. My paternal grandfather died long before I was born, and my mum’s parents always lived in Ireland so I only saw them once or twice in my life. I often wish I had known them better.

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    1. Thanks Michelle! We’re very fortunate to see T’s grandparents at least once a year (twice this year!). Like you, it helps make up for not really knowing my grandparents when I was growing up. 💕

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  9. I love this. Getting to spend one’s childhood with the grandparents is a luxury and a gift. And I’m glad T got to experience it. Like you, I had only met my grandmother (from my father’s side) when I was little, and she passed away when I was still in primary school. My paternal grandfather and my maternal grandparents died long before I was born. I echo what you said about how the pain of losing our mom can hit at unexpected times. But I’m happy to know that you are surrounded by so many loving souls in your life, Ab, because that is important for dealing with the loss.

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    1. Thanks Bama. It is a gift indeed and I’m thankful T has this as part of his childhood. 😊 And I’m sorry that you also didn’t get to know your grandparents. And I’m also sorry about your mom. I can understand how it hits at the most unexpected times. I hope you are surrounded by loved ones as the holidays approach us. 🙏

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  10. Oh my…my heart’s full. Thank you for taking us along, Ab. Happy belated birthday the hubby…such a special celebration. And I’m with Beth…love the pics from the Distillery District. There’s something about old brick…looks like home. Hugs to all! ❤️😊❤️

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    1. Thanks Vicki. It’s a beautiful place and the old brick buildings and the cobblestone streets and walkways are just so charming. Throw in the Christmas lights and it truly feels so festive and warm to be at. 💕

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  11. I can feel all the love, and joy, and acceptance just fly off this post, ab! a beautiful get-together., meltdown and all. how lucky you are to have your family, every one of them. p.s. the Christmas market looks wonderful, I love going to them

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    1. Thanks Beth. It’s a post of gratitude because my family feels smaller than it was three years ago. 💕 And the market is just so lovely. If you’re ever in Toronto during this time of the year, it’s worth a visit!

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  12. Happy birthday to the hubby! It’s great how his parents visited to celebrate. The Distillery District looks very festive for the holidays. T is lucky to spend a big part of his childhood with his grandparents on both sides. You’re right, the bond between a grandparent and kid is definitely very special.

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    1. Thanks Linda! If you’re ever in town with K and M, I think your family would love the Christmas Market. Go before 4 pm and it’s free admission and less crowded! You’ll have to try the spicy Mayan hot chocolate at Soma!

      And I hope M is enjoying her time with her grandparents too! 😊💕

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  16. What a special weekend for everyone with so much quality time and celebration! What a gift it is to have the unconditional of grandparents, and how lucky T is to have such a great support system. Happy birthday to your hubby, and I hope the year ahead is filled with joy!

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      1. Those overly-packed adventures are often the most memorable, so I’m sure as tiring as it was, there are many memories that everyone will cherish for a lifetime. 💕

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  17. I can relate to the feeling of missing a parent when watching kids interact with the grandparents they do have. It brings it all so close.

    Love Hubby’s parents for their unconditional love. How wonderful! Happy birthday to your Hubby. Here’s to a fabulous year ahead!! ❤ ❤ ❤

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  18. We’re in South Dakota right now with our grandson. He turns eighteen months tomorrow. He’s learned many words and is so much fun to be around now. Though we love just spending time with him and his parents, my favorite part is watching our son be a wonderful, patient, and loving father. He’s much more competent than I was when he was eighteen months old.

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    1. Happy 18 months to your grandson, Pete, and hope you enjoy your time together in South Dakota (on our wishlist to visit one day). Your son is the great father that he is because of his parents! 😊

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  19. Happiest birthday to your hubby, Ab. T is so lucky indeed to have grandparents at his side in this age. I grew up with no grandparents. They passed away when I was just five. Your photos are lovely and the cake looks so special. Anyway, you are mentioned in my blog today.

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    1. Thanks Hazel. I’m sorry to hear about your grandparents. Children are indeed lucky to get to grow up with their grandparents.

      And thanks for the mention and pond update on your blog! 😊

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